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Tuesday, May 22, 2012

Shiver

I had a dream I stood beneath an Orange Sky : Alexi Murdoch Now there's no room for negotiation and none for personally viable imagery. There's neither scope nor time for settlements. What you have now is what you'll hold forever and I wish I could say that you were a part of my scavenged dossier but I've sifted and even hunted in my last few bargained hours, but I found nothing. It's like you never existed. Just as well. 


Give me a lie, and I'll live it. Give me a robe and a fancy hat, and I'll don it. Give me a piece of paper and blood instead of ink, and I'll scribe it. Give me frivolity and I'll find a way to conjure short-lived beauty, peace and purity. Give me a pounding heart, and I'll pretend like I never heard it. 

 

This is us, old with no recourse to the past. What we have now is all we'll ever have. If you look at it through many rose tints you'd find it perfect and that's the best way to look at it. But if you dare lighten the shades... 

 

You find one place that you hope will let you forget and forgive and forgo. But if you carry all your baggage on your arm, up-sliding into your heart, seeping into your nervous system, and igniting dangerous cells, you can't expect even paradise to set you free. I've seen heaven and I've seen hell and I've seen them simultaneously. The worst part of not having a time lag between witnessing the two, is finding each equally mesmerizing and tempting. The two feelings rendering you unfit for either. When you get sucked into a roller-coaster ride of promise and hope and dejection and failure, you start enjoying the feeling of each. The loss that comes after the highs and the euphoria after the lows. 

 

All you had to do was ask. But you wouldn't. All I had to do was tell you. But I didn't. All that ever needed to be done, was untying the cruel knots that fate decided to put in the ropes that at some point would tow us back to each other. Maybe they're still not bad enough. Maybe 10 years later. Maybe not. I hate not knowing. But knowing would make me God. 


 

You're not mine. But I'm yours. And if that's not cruel, what is?

43 comments:

  1. Nice article. Did you write it?

    x
    www.cherryfactor.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  2. "Give me a lie, and I'll live it. Give me a robe and a fancy hat, and I'll don it. Give me a piece of paper and blood instead of ink, and I'll scribe it. Give me frivolity and I'll find a way to conjure short-lived beauty, peace and purity. Give me a pounding heart, and I'll pretend like I never heard it"

    Woooshhh...gave me chillls..effin awesome :)

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  3. hey kiran good to see you back :) and thanks everyone..

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  4. GIVE ME A LIE, AND I'LL LIVE IT..so profound! Such an intense post!

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  5. lovely! thanks for the comment!:)

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  6. vim retribuir a visita
    obrigada

    boa semana

    beijos

    http://www.metirademim.com

    ReplyDelete
  7. i love your blog...maybe we can follow each other??? kiss http://comeduegoccedacqua.blogspot.it/

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  8. I love your photos and descriptions! Following you :)

    http://fashionroll.net

    ReplyDelete
  9. Sure. let's follow each other blog !(:

    nice thoughts! (:

    xoxo

    ReplyDelete
  10. Thanks for stopping by and commenting on my blog.
    And sure we can follow each other, I'm following yours now.

    Xx
    http://justdailythings.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  11. clear and a pleasure to come back often descupe the delay was off for personal reasons and will always be on now
    kisses

    ReplyDelete
  12. Thanks for dropping by my blog. I'm following you now!:)

    Inside The Closet
    http://nicolealejandro.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  13. thanks for commenting on my blog hon, following now!
    A
    xx
    http://epiquemoi.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  14. Thanks for your comment, I'm glad you liked my Celebrity Paparazzi post!

    http://chicgeekblogger.blogspot.com/

    Please take a minute to look at my trunkshow;

    http://iouproject.com/tsh/jessica-karen/

    ReplyDelete
  15. hey, i follow your blog to!!

    xxxx.

    ReplyDelete
  16. ofcours, i'm following you right now!
    xox

    ReplyDelete
  17. thanks for your comment!:) we can follow each other:)

    ReplyDelete
  18. Love your writing and such beautiful photography! Xoxo

    Http://diaryofafashionista.com

    ReplyDelete
  19. great;) thanks for comment;)

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  20. Thank You for your comment and yes I would love to follow you back <3! Cool post with nice pictures ^^!

    xxx Katy ^^!

    ReplyDelete
  21. great blog, following you now, i hope u'll do the same
    http://aprettylife13.blogspot.com/

    ReplyDelete
  22. Great blog!! Awesome post! Thank you so much for stopping by & following!!!! I’m following you back now :)

    Have a great weekend!

    x♥x♥

    "Dicas de saúde, beleza, e exercício físico"



    ReplyDelete
  23. thanks for your comment on my blog :)
    I like yours!
    great post :)
    xoxo

    YOURFASHIONMOMENT.COM

    ReplyDelete
  24. yes we could follow each other i start :)

    ReplyDelete
  25. Hi, thanks for your comment! :) You have a very nice blog, too, and yes, we could follow each other :) xoxo ♥

    (ps. I already followed you ;))

    ReplyDelete
  26. Great blog. Of course we can follow each other. Im following you now, hope you can do the same :)
    Have a great week

    ReplyDelete
  27. Great blog! i'm following you now on GFC...i hope you follow me back!
    kiss, AngelaMia
    http://itisap4ssion.blogspot.it

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  28. Lovely sharing, both images and text : ) Thanks a lot : )

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  29. Hi, thanks for your comment at my blog! And sure, we can follow each other! Steffi

    http://yeux-brillants.blogspot.de

    ReplyDelete
  30. Hi! Love your blog i am your ollower n.187
    Please follow me back
    Kisses from spain
    www.ataadas.com

    ReplyDelete
  31. Thanks for the comment, I'm following now!!!

    kiss, kiss

    Telmíssima
    http://tpointfashionable.blogspot.pt/

    ReplyDelete
  32. thanks for your comment on my blog :)
    I'm following now ! ;)

    ReplyDelete
  33. thanks:) yes of course, i follow you now :)

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  34. great blog. do you want follow each other ?? :)

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  35. yes of course, i follow you now *-*

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  36. Your blog is really fantastic, it's different from others, it has meaning and purpose. Definitely stalking you :D

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  37. great post sweetie!!you have a new follower with googlefriend please support me back,
    there is a giveaway on my blog if you like come and check!!many kisses from,
    http://littlefashionwhitelies.blogspot.gr/2012/06/oasap-giveaway.html

    ReplyDelete
  38. postingan yang bagus tentang Shiver

    ReplyDelete